REVIEW: 'Damned' by Chuck Palahniuk

"According to my wristwatch I've been dead for three months, two weeks, five days and seventeen hours. Subtract that from infinity and you get some idea why loads of doomed souls abandon all hope."

Meet Madison Spencer, the thirteen year old narrator of 'Damned' by Chuck Palahniuk, who takes you with her on a journey of self-discovery as she finds herself wandering around the depths of Hell after a marijuana overdose. At first glance, 'Damned' seems like a coming-of-age story that borrows satirically from our coming of age favourites: Judy Blume's 'Are You There God, It's Me Margaret' and 'The Breakfast Club'.

It's not an easy book to get into: it took me a few months, reading a couple of pages every now and then, wondering if I'd ever progress or come to warm to this teenage girl, who's the product of rich parents who love her in your stereotypical 'we have no time to love you, and aren't quite sure if we know how, having kids seemed like the right things to do for our image' kind of way, and thinks she's a lot more clever than she actually is. At some point, I wondered if I disliked her because she's clearly what a white male author thinks a thirteen year old girl is like. Maybe it's meant to be satire. Who knows.

Luckily, the book picks up about two-thirds in, and becomes rather difficult to put down as the plot begins to thicken and point of the book starts hitting you in the face with each turn of the page (I found myself having a few 'oh, so that's what that was all about moments'), and you're getting all excited that the book is finally as interesting as the amazing covered promise and then - BAM. You fall off the edge of a cliffhanger, screaming 'DAMNIT PALAHNIUK - HOW DARE YOU MAKE IT INTO A SEQUEL' Basically, it ends much better than it starts, and the plot (and its twists), rather than the characters, leaves you wishing for more. 

On Goodreads, I gave this 4/5 stars, which was probably (definitely) too generous. Chuck Palahniuk is one of my favourite authors, so the writing itself is enjoyable, the cultural references are a nice way to give yourself brownie points when you understand them, and I think I might have let out the odd chuckle here and there, but it took me bloody ages to get into, Madison is about as annoying to read as you imagine annoying thirteen year olds to be, and once I finally got into it, it ended in a bloody cliffhanger. The chances of me rushing out to buy the sequel 'Doomed', are currently very low.

Overall, I give this 3/5 stars, and would recommend it to people who like their fiction peppered with culture references, and sitting somewhere between satire, humour, horror and 'I'm not sure if that scene was entirely appropriate'. Definitely not Palahniuk's best work, but he could do worse. 

Have you read Damned? Are you a Chuck Palahniuk fan?

This Week I've Been Listening To...

As tempting as it is to listen to Christmas songs on loop, my lack of innate Christmas spirit means that after an hour I am about done with all the cheer, though I think it's a lovely way to end the evening, with a nice warm cup of something, candles in the background and writing out those last Christmas cards (how did the deadline to send out cards get so close!) 

"Oh, there ain't no rest for the wicked

Money don't grow on trees

I got bills to pay, I got mouths to feed

And ain't nothing in this world for free"

- Ain't No Rest For The Wicked, Cage The Elephant

This week I've been listening to:

Bed of Lies, Nicki Minaj

Mr C, Nina Nesbitt

Two Worlds Away, Nina Nesbitt

Jazz, Mick Jenkins

push pull, Purity Ring

I'm Not The Only One, Sam Smith ft. A$AP Rocky

Sweater Weather, The Neighbourhood

Wires, The Neighbourhood

Afraid, The Neighbourhood

Flawless, The Neighbourhood

Ain't No Rest For The Wicked, Cage the Elephant

I may have listened to The Neighbourhood's album 'I Love You.' on repeat whilst blogging all week, but those are my favourite songs, besides '#icanteven', their latest single. I realised I never really listened to them much until now because I confused them with The 1975 who I am not a massive fan of. The song of the week would have to be 'Ain't No Rest For The Wicked' though. Perfect for a post-shower shimmy around the house.

What songs have you been listening to this week? 

This Week I've Been Listening To...

Don't you just love it when you stick to resolutions? I recently made myself a promise to try and venture from my musical comfort zone and listen to new artists every week, no matter how much I think that I could probably listen to Hozier's 'Take Me To Church' on loop for the next five years (how great is that song?!). 

Not that venturing out of my musical comfort zone simultaneously got rid of my habit of songs that I really like on a loop. I rediscovered Lily Allen this week, and having already exhausted 'It's Not Me, It's You' back when it came out in 2009, it was the turn of 'Sheezus'. Though I'm not sure about the solidity of the feminism behind 'Hard Out Here', it's a catchy enough tune perfect for singing along to at the top of my lungs to whilst doing the washing, and the 'URL Badman' response to a critic is amusingly clever (though I haven't dug deep into the origin of the beef that sparked this witty tune). 'Wind Your Neck In' is an additional track on the Deluxe Edition that I would qualify as this album's 'F** U' but not quite as direct. I also like her little odes to Mr Cooper in the form of 'L8 CUMMR' and 'As Long As I've Got You'. All in all, Sheezus is an album giving a lesson if blasting 'Smile' in your bedroom was once (or still is) one of your pastimes.

I got this thing, gonna tie your tongue

Step in my ring, you'll be out round one

You want to feel what you cannot touch

You think it's love but you think too much

- Got It, Marian Hill

This week I've also been listening to: 

• Long Way Down, Robert Delong
• Thinking Out Loud, Ed Sheeran
• Lips Are Moving, Meghan Trainor
• The Nights, Avicii
• Dangerous, David Guetta
• I Bet My Life, Imagine Dragons
• Mess Is Mine, Vance Joy
• Aferlife, Ingrid Michaelson
• I Can't Stop Drinking About You, Bebe Rexha
• Got It, Marian Hill
• Running Behind, HOLYCHILD
• I Followed You Home, Elliot Sumner
• Time, Mikky Ekko
• Lips, Marian Hill
• Twenty-Something, Noah Gunderson

I am really liking Meghan Trainor at the moment. Her EP already had me hooked, and her music is so bubbly, fun and deewop-y. Not to mention her amazing voice. Same with Marian Hill; 'Lips' and 'Got It' are definitely worth a listen. I didn't realise Bebe Rexha was the singer on David Guetta's 'Yesterday' which I am still in major like with, and 'I Can't Stop Drinking About You' would make a great pre-drink song for a girl's night out. Guess this week I've been really loving the female artists! 

What have you been listening to this week? Anything from my list? I'd love any recommendations!

Currently Loving: Meghan Trainor's 'Title'

There are very few people out there who like Mondays. Mondays mark the beginning of the work week, the school week, or basically a new week where you have to get a bunch things done. Amongst the things that can give you a much-needed jump-start to the week is a good, upbeat jam to dance around the bathroom in your underwear to so that Monday doesn't seem too gloomy. Meghan Trainor's debut  EP 'Title' gives you just that. 

All About That Bass

"If you got beauty, beauty, just raise 'em up

'Cause every inch of you is perfect

From the bottom to the top"

When Meghan's hit-debut 'All About That Bass' was climbing the charts I kept a wary distance, until one day last month I was introduced to it through a random playlist, and I haven't looked back since. I have a definite 'Easy A' Pocket Full of Sunshine relationship except that with this song I'm telling the shower head that 'I'm bringing booty back. Go ahead and tell them skinny bitches that'. Whilst the lyrics aren't perhaps as all-inclusive in their empowerment, the song is certainly catchy, fun and I dare you not to shake your thang all over your bedroom whilst singing this at the top of your lungs (room mates and neighbours be damned). I dare you. 

Title

"I know you think I'm cool
But I ain't one of the boys
No, don't be scared that I'm gon' tie you down
 I need a little more"

This is a perfect song for today's dating scene where casual is the norm, and putting the label of 'boyfriend/girlfriend' is explained away as something archaic and that adds pressure to the relationship from boys who just want to have a good time (but they're not going to come out and just tell you that in case that puts you off them). Meghan puts an end to that in this song announcing 'Better give me that title' especially 'if you want these sweet like sugar Gucci lips/ he gotta give it up'. I think sometimes we just need a reminder that it's perfectly okay to want a relationship from guys, and once we know what we want, to hold true to that and demand it. 

Dear Future Husband

"Dear future husband, here's a few things

You'll need to know if you wanna be

My one and only all my life"

Continuing the trend of knowing exactly what you want and demanding for it, 'Dear Future Husband' is a list of things that a future husband needs to take note of in order to have 'a perfect wife'. It's a bit of fun, and the doo-wop elements will have you tapping your foot as you nod your head to points you agree with Meghan on: 'You gotta know how to treat me like a lady/Even when I'm acting crazy/Tell me everything's alright' Are you listening future husband? 

Close Your Eyes

"I guess I could waste all my time and my money just trying to look right

But it doesn't change who I am in my heart if I look like a dime"

A pop album wouldn't be complete without a ballad, and 'Close Your Eyes' is a lovely song about keeping true to yourself and showing the world that you're beautiful as you are. It's soulful whilst maintaining the Trainor edge consistent throughout the whole album.

Highly recommend for: Monday morning pep, shower singing and for those post-break up or boy-trouble blues. Also good for pretending you're in a modern '50s dinner sharing a shake with your girls whilst tapping your foot along and swinging your ponytail to 2014 doo-wop feels.

Do you like Meghan Trainor? What's your current singing-in-the-shower-at-the-top-of-my-lungs song?